1. She doesn’t look like that in real life.
2. Brunch on a Tuesday? This makes no sense.
3. Why do I follow her?
4. I get it. You went running today.
5. Okay seriously…does anybody else work during the day?
6. That seems like a lot of effort.
7. Aspen? Wasn’t he in Cabo like last weekend?
8. They got a dog?
9. Unfollow.
10. Private profile? Are you kidding.
11. …did I just request to follow her?
12. Unrequest. Unrequest.
13. You can tell Kendall isn’t even wearing makeup in this one.
14. That crabcake actually looks really good. Where is that restaurant?
15. Are you serious?
16. I can’t tell if she’s pretty.
17. No, she’s like really pretty.
18. Guys shouldn’t even have Instagram.
19. So you go out to dinner like…every night?
20. I could definitely get a dog if I wanted one.
21. Maybe I should move to LA.
22. That filter makes her look plastic.
23. Like.

@walkofshames @thoughtcatalog #antoniegeiger@trophywifebarbie